Apparently, we can let sleeping DOGEs lie: Elon Musk has been sleeping on the ground in his workplace throughout the road from the White Home, unnamed “Republican sources in Musk’s orbit” told People in a report revealed Thursday.
Musk and his goofily-named, wow-that-really-exists Division of Authorities Effectivity have been intent on the federal government finances slash-and-burn mission since Donald Trump took workplace. They are saying that evil by no means sleeps, however apparently tech kajillionaires who’ve fairly bananapants energy over federal infrastructure do, therefore Musk’s alleged lil DOGE naps within the Eisenhower Government Workplace Constructing. Stripping vulnerable and minority groups of their protections and advocates can actually take it out of a man, to not point out flipping science the fiscal fowl!
The EEOB is correct throughout from the West Wing, and Musk is claimed to get cozy at Trump’s Mar-a-Lago when he’s down in Florida, so perhaps it’s a matter of proximity and luxury. Ssshhh, he’s proper there, he would possibly whisper to himself, gazing out on the home windows of Casa Trump, the TV’s comfortable blue mild flickering within the evening, his palm pressed to the glass of his personal workplace. It’s okay.
Musk has additionally spoken about his couch-surfing up to now, like when he stated that he slept on the floor in Tesla factories and didn’t have time to go residence and bathe. It’s good to have a passion, which in Musk’s case appears to be… his jobby. It’s not like Musk can’t afford a spot of his personal in D.C., MAGA actual property increase or no. It is a selection, identical to triaging federal decisions via public poll on social media. Observe that we didn’t say these are good decisions. Simply—decisions.
A kind of orbital Republicans advised Folks that so far as administrative buildings to sleep in, you would do worse than the EEOB. In spite of everything, it has “nice facilities, together with a cafeteria and bowling alley.” Cool. The supply added that Musk’s 4-year-old son, X Æ A-Xii, whom he shares with singer Grimes, “is round fairly a bit” too. Siri, play “This Used to Be My Playground.” Ahh, the halcyon days of childhood. You simply always remember these carefree moments together with your dad, simply two cool dudes attempting to burn down the IRS, aspect by aspect.
It looks like the time could possibly be ripe for a Goodnight Moon reboot—a bit of Goodnight MAGA, if you’ll. Image it: Identical nice inexperienced room, similar pink balloon, new president.
Goodnight morals / And goodnight range / Goodnight White Home / And goodnight bodily autonomy
Goodnight combover / And goodnight toothbrush (since fluoride goes by the wayside) / Goodnight human rights / Goodnight Musk / And goodnight to the made-up authorities company whispering, “cuts.”
