“I noticed the place the lawyer common of Alabama mentioned the opposite day that ‘Alabama has accomplished it, and now, so are you able to. And we stand prepared to help you in implementing this methodology in your states.’ And I have to say that I assumed it was fantastic information to listen to that Alabama has lastly discovered a solution to clear up its dreadful jail system.”
“No. That’s not it.”
“Possibly then a system to streamline incarcerated folks’s complaints and allegations, so we are able to higher deal with violence and unsafe circumstances in Alabama’s prisons, thus making them safer and extra constitutionally compliant. That’s lengthy overd….”
“Nah.”
“Ah, nicely, in fact – it have to be the continuing unlawful acts dedicated by the Alabama Board of Pardons and Paroles then. These of us aren’t even following their very own legal guidelines that they requested to be handed. It’s about time they mounted that me….”
“No.”
“Bizarre. So then he’s clearly speaking concerning the little one labor happening at manufacturing amenities all around the state then. Whew. And right here I assumed this man was turning a blind eye to this as a result of it didn’t match with the same old GOP speaking poi….”
“No. They’re really in favor of kid labor within the GOP. Sustain.”
“Sorry, forgot. It’s exhausting to maintain up with whether or not we’re defending the youngsters from the risks of woke Disney this week or placing them on the meeting line. But when that’s not it, I assume it needs to be the rivers and lakes, proper? Ol’ Steve Marshall has lastly discovered a solution to go after the polluters and make it the place we are able to as soon as once more eat a fish caught within the Tennessee River. I knew he’d get arou….”
“No.”
“OK then. These look like good, noble points for us to sort out. Possibly he was speaking about Alabama turning round our schooling system by lastly arising with a solution to deal with the inherently racist funding system that we’ve used since 1901, which has led to perpetually one of many worst-performing public college methods within the nation. I bear in mind when Jeff Classes caught his nostril into an effort to vary that system and guarantee predominantly Black colleges received equal funding. Good to see an Alabama AG lastly have the braveness to knock down this relic of the Jim Crow period of Alab….”
“Not even shut.”
“Properly is he at the least speaking a few plan to handle the school-to-prison pipeline that has proven the over-disciplining of minority kids in colleges usually results in a higher probability that these children wind up in jail? Alabama has an actual downside in that space, as a number of research have proven and fixing it will be a trul….”
“Hahaha. No.”
“Is it at the least unlawful playing? Is he at the least speaking a few solution to lastly correctly regulate and govern the unlawful, back-of-the-gas station playing on this state that’s propping up organized crime all around the nation? As a result of that may at the least be one thing worthwhile to ….”
“Nope.”
“He’s discovered a more practical solution to crack down on public corruption and self-dealing lawmak…?”
“Destructive.”
“He’s discovered a brand new solution to maintain pharmaceutical firms accountable for the opioid epidemic, which continues to crush Alabama and different poor sta….”
“Incorrect once more.”
“He’s give you a brand new solution to crack down on the AI scams which can be bilking good folks out of ….”
“No.”
“A crack down on unlawful weapons? Possibly a solution to defend cops from these permitless carry legal guidelines that the state handed?”
“Nope.”
“A brand new solution to defend seniors from on-line scams?”
“Pfft.”
“How about only a solution to cease the calls about my automobile’s prolonged guarantee?”
“No. It’s none of these. You’re not shut. The man’s speaking about Alabama arising with a revolutionary solution to kill a human being. His complete press convention was to rejoice the truth that we efficiently – should you depend 20-plus minutes of struggling for breath earlier than dying as a hit – smothered a man to demise.”
“That’s what he desires to assist different states with?”
“Sure, as a result of from our excessive maternal mortality charges to our embarrassing toddler mortality charges to the off-the-charts gun demise charges to our 300-plus-deaths-per-year prisons to excessive charges of demise to an absence of entry to well being care to our low life expectancy charges, if there’s one factor Alabama is aware of, it’s demise. Now we’re going to begin exporting it.”
“That’s tousled.”
“Provided that you lack primary human compassion.”
